Friday, December 5, 2014

Wander

"You should start a blog."

It's a phrase I have heard often, usually at times when I suspect I have rambled on for a bit too long about something the person I am talking to could not possibly care less about. Blogging has always seemed lame and presumptuous to me. Why do bloggers think anyone cares about their ideas on the latest political scandal or what they've been making for breakfast? On top of that, I have always had an apprehensive attitude about blogging, because it involves putting my thoughts out there for friends and family (and everyone else in the world) to see. Even though I am an English major, and have dreamt of being a writer for as long as I can remember, the idea of letting other people actually read my writing has always intimidated me. But hey, that's probably a fear I should get over sometime, so I may as well start a blog.

Blog. What a weird word. I wonder if I even want to have a blog. Maybe I'll go by the old fashioned term: "Weblog." There, that's better.

The more pressing reason I am starting a blog that I may or may not update regularly? I am moving to Scotland for 5 months. I'm excited, because this is something I have wanted for such a long time, and now it is finally happening. I was so nervous in the first stages, when I was applying, and then hoping my application was solid, and then waiting for the acceptance, and then waiting to hear back about this application and that application and this application and that application that had to be verified by my university and the university in Glasgow ( I filled out a LOT of applications, for a LOT of different things). I was truly worrying, for the first time in my life. I have always had a very carefree attitude about almost everything, but suddenly, I was worrying about everything. And, despite my worry, everything worked out. Again and again, I felt God's hand was so evident in every step of the process. Now, the airplane tickets are booked, I may not have started packing yet, but I have a pretty solid list of stuff I need to pack, and I leave for Glasgow in just 4 days.

Wander has been on my mind lately. The concept of wandering. To me it brings about an ache in my gut, a desire to jump on the next train, not caring where it takes me, or how long it'll be until I'm home again, or how much money I have stuffed in my back pocket. Webster's Dictionary defines "wander" as "to move around or go to different places usually without having a particular purpose or direction." To me, that is both terrifying and invigorating.  The thing is, I have a path, in life. It's just not particularly clear yet, but I know the more I search for it and the more I ask God to make my path clear, the more defined it will become. For now, I don't think there is any shame or anything wrong, in simply wandering wherever I may, enjoying life, and taking in as many different cultures and meeting as many different people and going to as many different places as I can.

Ok, time to stop avoiding the pile of clothes in the corner and actually kind of start packing. But anyway, for pictures, stories, and more (okay, probably not more), you can check in here.

Carrie